Remember the first time someone broke your heart? The pain seemed like it was unbearable and all you wanted to do was not feel it. Who wants to deal with the hurt? Today's subject, coping mechanisms. I have many things that I do when I am stressed. Sometimes I workout, sometimes I overeat, sometimes I drink and sometimes I quote scriptures to myself. Of course the latter method is the best of them all. At the end of this blog, please feel free to share how you cope. Let's help one another.
I can remember a friend telling me that I don't like to feel my emotions. Who does? It's irritating! You ever get the feeling that you feel emotions way deeper than other people? That's how I think. I love way harder than the common man, I hurt way more than anybody else, when I am happy---I am the happiest person on earth! The truth of the matter is it takes a stronger person to face their emotions than it does to run from them. We ALL love hard, we all hurt, we all can exhibit extreme happiness. What sets us apart is the way we deal with these emotions once they are shaken.
One of my guilty pleasures is the TV show on A&E, Intervention. I LOVE this show. How many of you know that if you look back over your life and are truly honest; there have been plenty of times when you were one drink, one high, one love, one pill or one sexual partner from needing an intervention yourself. I like Intervention so much because I am always intrigued by the story that pushed them to the edge. What was that one thing that made them think they didn't want to feel that pain anymore? Why didn't they know how to cope?
We are rarely taught how to cope with adversity. Lord knows I wasn't. You often emulate the habits you see growing up when it comes to coping. I saw tons of addiction growing up so when I grew up, guess what I leaned towards...addiction. That is such a scary word. You think you have it under control but then one day you realize that you are dependent on a substance or a person that is not yourself or God. You are an addict. It's not cute, it's not in style but it is the truth.
I spent most of my 20's being a walking zombie. My coping mechanisms were non-existent. No one ever taught me how to deal with adversity. Unfortunately, it was something I had to learn the hard way. I drank like nobody' business. I remember at first it was fun. I would drink to be more social. It wasn't a big deal. It wasn't until I realized that I was drinking in order to become numb that I realized I was on the brink of a drinking problem. Even more embarrassing and terrible, I was an angry drunk. I directed anger to the people I loved the most. I was a wreck. People who know me know that I use to NEVER get angry. What I've learned over the years is that it is okay to get angry. It is wonderful to express and feel every, single emotion. When you allow yourself to feel, you then can deal. Avoidance is never the answer.
So as I ramble through this blog and I try to close, I ask myself what do I want to leave with y'all today? I just want to say that it's never to late to learn. If you feel like you have unhealthy coping mechanisms, change. Period, the end. If you know someone with unhealthy coping mechanisms, don't judge but offer to be a help. Trust me, no matter how perfect you are, you are ONE situation away from being in that addict's shoes. Let's continue to edify. Let's take a pledge to build each other up, instead of tear each other down. Let's be the teachers our childhood wasn't.
Miracles and Blessings!
No comments:
Post a Comment